My anniversary is coming up, the one where I left my now ex husband due to abuse. I am starting to get a little antzy wondering if I deserve what I want out of a relationship. So far I have failed which does not give me much hope at all. Some are not the settling type, some are oblivious, and some just need some time. So, I try to think of what I really want when it comes to my next relationship and then I saw a friend's video of her mom before she passed away.
I look at the pictures and feel my eyes water up partially because I remember my friend's mother. She was the sweetest lady ever. Then I see what I want from the pictures shown in the video. I want love as though it were my first with burning passion to where you cannot stand to live without that person ever. I want someone who will push me to be a better person and who feels the same for me towards him. I want someone to hold me like I am weak even though I am strong, someone who recognizes that I am a lady even though I may be strong enough to keep up with the guys.
I think back and remember arms wrapped around my body that were meant to keep me safe. Maybe a kiss on the forehead with the intention that I am one in a million. All in all I want a love that could hurt. There is nothing more coveted than something that is the rarest thing ever.
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