The Remora of Standing Out

Remora.  A bit of a weird look word, not to mention a bit of a weird feel on your lips when you say the word. Remora.....reh-morrrrr-ah! Ray-MORE-ah.  Well, no matter how you still say, it sucks, literally.  A remora is a fish, usually referred to as a Sucker Fish, that attaches to a host and cleans up the waste.  I was thinking about this concept a bit today as my thoughts ran wild to another animal that sucks, a leech, but leech is more an animal based on greed when it desires the blood of its host. 

As irrelevant as telling you a brief description of a remora, I have to admit that some things in life seem to have their own remora.  I am going to be brutally honest here, but like any other person I have doubts in myself if I am 'good enough.'  I wonder if I am good enough for specific positions I apply for concerning employment, I wonder if what I write is good enough that it will either be enjoyed or produce a fan, and I worry that all my life I have spent so much time blending in that I may never stand out. 

I remember in fourth grade where a teacher I admired would play pranks with some 'popular girls' in my class and it was not until I wrote one of the girls a note to be friends that the teacher actually remembered my name. (Yes, I was with one teacher for a whole year and she knew my name from a list, but when it came to my face, I lost even that.)

In high school I was scared to join choir at first because I had been told I had a beautiful sounding voice and with compliments like I was scared to let any talent I had show.  So instead I held back.  I continued to sign up for choir, blending in with the rest of my section, watching as the spot light was turned on other individuals, and watching as my favorite teacher ignored me more and more as he focused on the others.  The same thing happened in band where it was more comfortable for me to seat closer to the middle of the stage, where I could hide a bit, than be out in front of the audience.  Keep in mind that this was also during those timid years where a teenager starts to notice certain traits that do not fit in with the rest or should I say are undesirable.

I will tell you the small unforgettable (sadly) events do not stop there, but they are things to think about even during certain events in my life now.  To be noticed in choir I had to join a small singing group, remora.  In the last couple years I lost a good chunk of weight and now receive positive attention from people who would not give me the time of day based on my weight. Remora.  Within the last year I have applied for the same position multiple times.  It was not until I had a career center look at my resume that I was considered for an interview. Remora.  (However, I did not think much of the career place as they did not seem to have a decent grasp on the English language, which annoyed the F*** out of  me and made me wonder what qualified that person for the position she held).


As you can, it took something else to make me look good, so my mind is troubled a bit with the incecent question, 'When am I just good enough without my remora?'  The Dr. Seuss rebuttal? "Why fit in when you were born to stand out?"


Right now, I do not know how, I do not know when, but hopefully I will learn or find a way to be more than average to stand out on my own without someone or something else being used to make me look better.  With my birthday approaching in the next couple years, I still sometimes feel like I am the teenager back in high school learning lessons in life even though I feel at my age I should have figured some of lessons out prior to now.  This may also be why I am a better writer.  As a writer I can stand out in my own fantasy world, but lately that has disappeared, which might be the reason for a feeling of loss.  What happens when the fairy tales that you once starred in die?  You try to find a little fairy dust to give you happy thoughts again to find your way back.

The Heart of the Band

I do not know how many of you have ever seen the movie Drumline starring Nick Cannon, but I feel I need to start here to give a clear understanding as to something that has been on my mind the last week in a new school term.

The movie Drumline is about a kid with a passion as a drummer who goes to college and joins the marching band, specifically the drum line.  The kid, played by Cannon, is a freshman who is extremely talented, which is intimidating to others, even the leader of the drum line.  Basically the theme of the story becomes that 'there is no 'i' in team' or in this case 'You're the best, Devon, but when we're on the field, nobody hears you.  They hear the band.'

I am sure you are wondering what this has to do with anything.  Well, there is this part in the movie where you see the leaders of each section of the band giving a pep talk to his or her own section.

'Trumpets are the voice of the band.  We are the melody.  We are the clarity.'
'Tubas are the most important section of this band...Tubas are the boom...'
'Saxophones are the truth, the funk, and the hook.  See, once they hear us, they recognize the song'

and then the camera turns to the drum line as they are clapping....clap...clap...clap...and the clapping speeds up as the drum leader says:

'We are the heart and the soul.  Without the percussion section, the band doesn't move, doesn't come alive....'

*Increase clap speed*

'We are the pulse, and without a pulse, you're dead.'

*Clapping stops*

'That's why we're the most important section of the band.'




With a specific perception, the small pep talks may look conceited, but in actuality are completely honest.  In today's society  people think that the the one thing they are passionate about is the one thing that makes our world go round.  Without science we would not have found fuel to power machines or chemical mixtures that make up medicine to improve a person's health. Oh, but without technology we would not have the records to access the information for science or have the capability combining the mixture properly.  Oh, BUT WAIT, without language, English for me, we would not have the capability to record any of this information in order for progress or evolution of substances to continue.

As you can see, each sentence is similar to the idea to the pep talks above, but also notice that without each piece, the puzzle cannot progress to something better.  Why am I acknowledging this concept?  Debate.  No, I do not want to start one, as it has already been started, but I want to finish it with this acknowledgment.  For instance, some people think that technology is the main contributor to how much our knowledge and understanding of the world has grown and as much as part of me can empathize with that thought, I have to send in the rebuttal with my passion for English and say that no one would have known of the progression in technology had you not had language as a tool used to communicate this information.  So would that not mean that language or communication make the world go around?

It is not really a thought or a debate at this point because as many know of science, you cannot create a solid theory with multiple variables.  However, you need to have multiple passionate people control the many variable aspects that make the world go around. ;)