The Idolization in the Thought of the Super Hero

Yep, I said it.  We idolize super heroes left and right, but may not in the way you would interpret when you think of "super heroes."

I bet most of you read the title, thinking about Marvel Comics and even some of the new movies or televisions series that have been produced based on these ideas, but unfortunately (sorry to disappoint) this is not that type of post.  

I went to the gym today and as I was running I had one of those "Oh, I'm so old" moments that made me think back to my childhood memories.  I remember when I was younger wanting to grow up to be just like my parents because, at the time, it seemed they could do anything and nothing would stop them.  I thought they were invincible.  So me, being a typical reckless clumsy youngster, would try anything.  I would climb on tractors, jump in pens with animals that my size or bigger, attempt to do a cartwheel in the back yard while falling (sometimes on my head and no comments from the peanut gallery:P), rolling down ditches, etc.  And what happened?  Bumps, bruises, scars, and lucky me, nothing broken.  I could do anything.  I was "King of the World."  I was...a nincompoop. (Yes, I just admitted that too).

It is interesting how at a young age we create this world around us where we are invincible, similar to superpowers, when all we are is innocent and ignorant about the things around us.  It is also interesting how, in some cases, our parents seem to be our super heroes as "adults can do anything", they can kiss a boo-boo away to make us feel better, and they can solve any Math problem in our schoolwork.  Pretty amazing, huh?  Well, maybe at that age it is.

Now as an adult, still with the decent ignorant imagination of my former reckless clumsy self who has no verbal filter, I look at me then and now realizing that although my mind is invincible my body seems to disagree.  (Yes, they fight on a daily basis and I have to sit them both in separate corners.)  Some of you may tell me "That is what happens when you get older," but I feel the need to reject that statement, partially because I have always been a rebel or one to challenge the odds set against me.  I may not be super and lost my typical "spidey-senses," but, as my mom likes to remind me, "I'm not dead yet."  This statement has been used in many different scenarios from physical abilities, discussions on sex and attraction, and even just discussions on limitations that we are determined to defy.

Sometimes I wish my parents had been Mr. and Mrs Incredible or that I had some genetic alteration and could fly through the night.  Hell, just reading minds might be intriguing, but I have always followed the idea that sometimes the things we think we want to know, we truly do not actually want to know.  So for now, even though I am not invincible and my joints need a bit of oil,  I will try to push my limits to my very end because someday I know that even though I am not super, I will get my chance to fly.

How People Make Cents

I bet you looked at that title with the first idea of how to make money or make more money, right?  Sorry to disappoint, but this is not that type of entry.  However, it is one on human investments.

You see, investing in people is like investing financially, although there is more to lose.  Not only do you lose time or money, you lose trust, respect, you lose emotions that you never knew existed while allowing yourself to be completely naked beyond physical structure (framework), and your realize the risk of your vulnerability.  So what happens to a company that fails financially?  What happens to a person who fails with the personal investment in another?  Do you pull your stock or do you wage a bit longer to see if you can break even?  Personally, even though based on some random events in my life that say I should have won the lottery by now had I bought a ticket, I am not the type to gamble big even though I have been careless in my past (if not recently).

What makes for a good investment?  Dedication, loyalty, communication, maturity, maybe responsibility, sugar, spice, and everything nice? (Oh, sorry.  Got off track there.)  No matter the case, it takes work.  For instance, lack of loyalty creates distrust or lack of communication may create a lack in respect, but apparently investments come in multiple forms, some even unhealthy versions.

You may laugh at this a bit, but I love watching social media sites.  Everyone wants their "fifteen minutes of fame" or two-sentenced-cry-baby-verbal-vomit moment to gain attention. Oh no, my boyfriend broke up with me.  I hope he dies an awful death. Um, yeah, I totally feel your pain (enter the voice of Ben Stein).  My friend is a b****, but I can't say that word, so I'll just make it look pretty with stars.  Excuse my while milk comes flying out of my nose.  Oh and then there is the "like" stalker.  This is the person who "likes" everything one in particular person posts, but seems to miss anything else that might actually be life changing, thus becoming hypocritical.  For lack of a better phrase, I call this digital proximity because you feel like you are "near" that person as you "support" the individual.  (Palm to forehead) How do I say this gently?.....GET A LIFE!  Talk about an investment with no return.

So why is it that a part of us never seems to grow beyond "bad investments"?  Do we enjoy torturing ourselves?  Is there some morbid desire in rejection?  Could be just be too stupid to operate without some form of dysfunction?  Yes.  We are human, it is what we are known for, and it is what we do best.  That does not mean that all of us become victims to our own emotional self-mutilation, but it does reflect a bit of darkness in humanity. 

Then why is it so hard for us to change even though we are aware of this shortcoming?  I could take the cheap easy route and say "we are human," but I feel the need to point out that things in life are provided by choice.  You have a choice to be angry at someone, you have a choice to sit and wallow in your own self-pity, and you have a choice to act like an immature child in an adult body.  It is not that hard to find a resolution instead of complaining about it.  I know I have mentioned this before, but if you do not like something, change it (Don't you hate when your mother's voice pops in your head every so often?)  

One loss is....it is an investment that needs to be taken to the trash because of how toxic it has become.  You get angry because you feel stupid, you refocus because being angry is not worth the time, and move on to new goals.  And when you are done you Facebook stalk the person and find out how crappy they are without you.....Just kidding.  You can Google them instead :P  (Sorry folks.  If you did not know by now, I cannot seem to keep a topic serious.  Life is too short not to have fun and laugh at it every once in a while.)

In lieu of the above, someone once told me the person's favorite quote was "Be the change you wish to see in the world"-Gandhi.  I would like to counteract that with a thought this person should consider, "Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself"-Leo Tolstoy

So where does the investment start to make cents (sense)? With ourselves.  We can choose toxic or we can change and move on.  I don't know about the rest of you, but I feel "change and move on" provide more opportunities in life...just sayin'. ;)

Why Valentine's Day Seems to Miss its Own Point.

As of a few minutes ago, Valentine's Day became official.  That is correct.  Break out the candy, the flowers, and dare I say the indulgent ever fornicating facade of love.  (Shoot! Was I daring again in my word choice?)  Yes, I believe Valentine's Day is a facade because of the required obligation it provides for society to PROVE love.  Why can I not just love you every day?  Why do I have to show or tell you "I love you" on this specific day?

Sorry folks, but I am going to preach this every year because it bugs the crap out of me how I watch everything commercialized in the thought of love that love itself becomes so fake.  Do not get me wrong in that I do not appreciate when someone thinks of me (who doesn't?), but I will always appreciate it more when it is sporadic instead of forced.  How else do you know if someone truly cares about you?  When that person did something or said something when you least expected it.  

You, my reader, are probably going to laugh at me when I say this, but I have been reading a bunch of blogs on the holiday the last couple days (partially in procrastination of my school paper-did I mention I am a master at procrastinating?) and I laugh at the stereotypes printed out there; "Oh, how I love thee" or "I f*cking hate this holiday".  I do not hate Valentine's Day, but I do not agree with what it stands for and what it does to society.

Personally, after many different life events, I appreciate the small things in life and I try my best to portray that to others.  To me, a simple hug given when you did not know a person was having a bad day, a "Good morning" note, simply acknowledging a person may look like something is wrong and need a friend (and no this is not stating a person looks like crap, which some may interpret), or maybe, considering the holiday, giving a small token resembling "I care about you" to someone not in a relationship as it seems the rest of the world couples up.  

So is it weird that my thoughts process like this?  Am I alone when I think this?  Is there anyone else who understands the concept here?

Food for thought:

I saw on social media a message stating "Any dude that waits for Valentine's Day to treat his woman like a Queen is failing 364 days of the year."  I was a bit curious, so read the comments below where a young man stated he saved up his money for this one day (one of the most expensive days of the year might I add) to "go big or go home" in proving his love (enter palm to forehead).  Prorating throughout the year or waiting for one single day?  Then I laughed because my initial thought was "What about treating a man like a King?"  Okay, now society would really categorize me as weird for this backwards train of thought considering the stereotypical thought is that this is all for the women. Pffft! 

I guess my beef is....to the person I have a committed relationship with (this includes a coupling relationship, friendship, family-ship, sinking ship, Oops!) I fell in love with you before.  I love you today, I love you tomorrow, and as long as we continue interacting in each other's lives I will continue to work on that love until you tell me...well, for lack of a better phrase,...that it needs to die.  So to all those whom I care about, no matter the type of relationship, I love you and ...make today a great one.  My other personalities and I are going to enjoy each others' company in a warm petal filled bath with a giant cup of coffee to relax. (Sounds kinky, right? and yet only some of you will understand the sarcasm in it)  Have a great day!

The Disability of Humanity

Today I went to one of the local department stores, which I would rather not say even though anyone reading this will figure it out after I describe it a bit further, where there was a greeter with a disability.  Now this may seem weird, but I would purposely walk slow in order to watch people in how they would interact with this particular person as it stunned me how much differences affect human behavior.  It was rare that anyone would acknowledge this person's presence and honestly, it pained me to be the idiot watching these events take place.

Before I continue a bit further, I am going to state that I am not perfect or even always the nicest person, but humanity has always been a priority of mine.  I look at people with the idea that there is more to those people, so I may push for something more from them, that is until their actions tell me I am no longer wanted/needed. I have seen people do great things in life and I will admit I am proud to have been a part of if not contributed towards that.

Focusing back to my intention of this post.  My mother, bless her heart (and the rest of her I suppose ;-P), has assisted individuals with disabilities for multiple years, something I will and have admitted I could not do the same way she had for so long, but I appreciate that there are people like her to do this job.  It is this idea that makes me think, "If that were me I would be thankful for her [them]."  What I have witnessed in my younger years, and even in observation of the aforementioned event, is how "normal" people treat those who are not like them.  At this point, I could probably tangent off on the topic of "bullying," but feel the need to stay focused on how you can tell a lot about an individual based upon how they treat others.

I will be forthcoming as I admit that I will, at times, bring a person to my mother's place of work to "test" the individual's reaction.  To some, who do not understand,  this may seem like a game or a type of mockery, so let me just say that the same is done with exposure to my own family. :-P (P.S. if you met them and understand certain circumstances,  you would comprehend why this is an important point). I have seen every reaction from utter disgust to heartfelt welcoming to the people that reside at my mom's place of employment.  Anything other than a welcoming demeanor from an individual is then trashed (as in we are done and you need to leave my life).   Yes, I said "trashed " because how dare you treat another human being as anything less!  A negative response gives the rest of humanity a bad name because of some spoiled ignorant outlook on something distinguished that apparently cannot be comprehended by the simplicity of one's cowardness.  I know, very bold of me to make such a statement, but I do not feel it is undeserving in many cases.

So what inspired me to write this rant?  It is because of the things I have witnessed and my background in caring for humanity that I make a point to say "hi" to the greeters.  Yes, 'greeters', meaning all of them no matter who, what, where, when, why, or how different the person is from me because I always wonder that if they took this position to "make someone's day," why can I not return the favor with a simple greeting?  Anyway, after all my shopping was done, I went to the register, checked out my items, and a small voice, that I had never heard before, spoke up saying "Thanks for coming.  Have a great night."  The voice was not the clearest I had ever heard, but it was enough that I could understand what was being said.  I looked up from grabbing my bags and returning the basket I used for shopping to see in front of me the greeter whom many choose to ignore.  I thanked the greeter, wishing the same upon the individual, and as I walked away I had to look back and smile with one of those Hallmark tears coming to my eye.  I never thought I would hear that person speak, let alone knew this greeter could speak, but for that brief moment while I walked to my car I realized that it is the little things that count in life to the individuals around us considering I did not hear any other salutations made to anyone else after me leaving the registers.  This may sound a bit trite, especially after a fairy tale-ish type story, but I look forward to going back to the store to once again say 'hello' to this greeter in hopes that another single occasion can create a moment we can both smile upon.

"Work doesn't define you, _______"

I was recently told this statement within the last week as journey into the break up of one relationship into the establishment of another.  This statement range true in my mind and yet it puzzled me on what actually defines me.  Hard work?  Determination?  Strength?  Although I have preached many times on strength as it is a term that has taken me far in the last couple years considering how many times I have shoved or smacked down in my own personal life.  Getting back up is a struggle...for anyone at times and strength is no longer defined by the physical core of a human.  Strength has become the tool of another entity:  determination.

Where is this established and how is it made?  Struggles, the reactions we choose once we meet the pavement.  I see many people these days give up, not only kissing the pavement because they have been knocked down, but then kissing it to establish a relationship where they choose not to get up.  They lie there expecting that things will be handed to them not knowing that the hand to help them up can only reach so far in order to not become victim to the pavement also. 

I might say that I consider myself lucky some days because I had parents who instilled in me a bit of a fight, one that at one time saved my life.  At a young age, I spent a lot of time with my mother and I watched how she raised my siblings and I on what seemed like next to nothing financially, but included things beyond money and material items:  the value of a team/family.  My father then taught me to challenge things, to question norms, and expect explanations whether logical or not.

What does this have to do with the statement titling this entry?  I go to work to my team/family multiple days of the week determined to contribute to the success of the team.  What does that mean?  In short, I figure out how I can benefit my professional family and leave it in better condition than when I left it.  I do this through the drive to provide quality work, to mark off tasks on the team's "checklist", and through helping my professional family members personally and professionally.  I am determined to achieve success in many aspects of life, professionally in this case, but I am NOT going to leave anyone behind who presents the willingness of success as well.  To me, success does not include one person, but includes many and my success is their success (can we say how trite/cliche that sounds? LOL).  

So the state, "Work doesn't define you, _______" was tossed at me because my passion burned a bit deep and I gave too much of myself as I ran into a moment of derailment.  Is there such thing as too much determination?  Too much fight?  Yes, when it takes over who you are to the point that success is just that and lacks in quality.  Sometimes it takes a person a bit of a verbal slap to the face to show you that "I understand, but you need to remain true to yourself also."  Derailing is how to lose one's self while  verbal vomiting is a procedure to fix your your engine. ;)  

This statement does not stop here, but allows for provoking thought.  So what defines a person?  What defines you?  What puzzle pieces reflect you?  Maybe, what defines us are the things we want in life (beyond material assets, of course).  I was not intended to find an answer here or even define one today, but I did want to share in this thought to see what people came up with for themselves.  Feel free to share and if not....enjoy!

Those Moments When I Shut Up

Pardon me for sounding like a giddy school grade girl, but I LOVE it when people surprise me (Sorry, guys, I know you-Creepy, right?).  I may be working on my graduate degree in English, but that does not necessarily mean I am "good" at talking.  However, I am "good" at listening. >:)

For those of you who do not know, when I shut up...that means you are in trouble.  Terms such as smartass and sarcastic were used and it was interesting to me to see how individuals discuss these terms with the idea of complete understanding when society dictates the implied meaning.  What do I do?  Haha (yes, that was an evil laugh).  I go home to research the terms considering that IS my field of study (*pretend superhero voice*  I feel a sense of responsibility and obligation to my fellow... Oh fuck it!) LOL

Anyway, smartass was defined by the individual to be something condescending or viewed with negative perspective, so being the smartass  that I am, I told the individual that I was a sarcastic person.  (Did you catch that there?).  I have this ringing in my ears every so often as I use the word sarcasm, or any form of it, as I think back to my high school English teacher with his superiority complex, educationing feeble minds in terms such as sarcasm and fudge packer.  As much as I disliked the teacher, I will say the individual taught me a few things about English. 1) How dissecting a word will give you insight to its meaning and 2) Where our language comes from or is formed, which is where I first learned the meaning of sarcasm.  Before I tangent too far, sarcasm is actually formally defined to be the condescending term while smartass (or smart ass-Might have to change to bilingual mode of using smart arse. :P), is a form of sarcasm. 

Hmmmm, what a concept? Per individual perspective and interpretation versus formality, proves that...well, obviously we were not on the same page as far as the conversation is concerned.  Yes, I am laughing hysterically at this considering this is why I love language, specifically English.  What I think was meant to be defined was the difference between sarcasm  and satire.  I, personally, use them interchangeably due to society's understanding and interpretation, but in blunt terms...sarcasm is mean and satire is nice in using irony. (Yes, that is a very simple definition).

I may not have proven much, besides I know my terms and how to do research.  I admitted I use everyday terminology incorrect to grasp a concept on the correct and incorrect utilization of words by anyone and everyone around me.  I sit here with a bit of satisfaction, after my mind was stalemated, thinking that I should shut up more often.  Sadly, when I do, people think I am ignorant when really...I am just proving you wrong.

Making the Most of a New Year: 2016

In the last twenty-four hours millions of people have been rehashing the choices made or the actions taken during the past year or 2015, which is a pretty typical thing to do during the turning of a new year.  I, for a good reading laugh, did not, like last year, spend the turning of the new year in the bathroom.  (I know, you all smile at that in a 'palm to forehead' moment).  

While people reflect back, they begin to make plans on improvements upon how to make the next year better by creating "resolutions". This year I did some reflecting, but with one change of only making one resolution, to not make any resolutions. (Ironic not?)  Instead, this coming new year I am going to be pushing for something a bit more.  I am going to push for accomplishing goals and ones that can potentially be achievable.

So I have the typical school and work (boy, do I sound like a boring adult), but then there is the goal to improve my health even further than the year before.  I may not be getting any younger, even though I am technically not THAT old, but I do not ever want to really feel "old," however that may feel exactly.  I want to run further, walk faster, breathe easier, and lift more than I did before.  I do not want to become big beefy looking lady, not that it is bad, it is just not what I desire.  I am proud that in leaving 2015 I have, however, been able to lift/press/push half my weight with my upper body and arms while going beyond my own weight using my legs.  Considering past years I feel this is an accomplishment that can only grow allowing me to, hopefully, this year run a 5K, Mudrun, or some sort of physical test of accomplishment that will allow me to progress to the next level.  (Whatever I decide that to be).

Another goal this  year is to try new things, one every week if possible.  Yes, this is vague and open, but that is done on purpose.  I am currently in a new town and still able to explore, so there are restaurants that I have not tried, events I MUST attend, and people I NEED to meet.  For instance, if finances allow, I want to go sky-diving.  Ok, everyone who shriveled up inside themselves can come out now.  I want to fly, to spread my arms and feel the air rush around me and through my hair.  I want this feeling of accomplishment as I face a fear proving that some part of me is invincible even if it is just my spirit...as I could break a leg during the course of my landing.  The point is, I am not going to sit here and ask the 'what if' questions anymore.  Instead of wasting time pondering I plan to make choices. Go left or right? Right.  Black or white? White.  To wait for an answer or move on? Move on.  If I have to waste time pondering, then I really did not want the answer I am pondering over.  Sometimes these answers are stronger than us and we need to just accept them and run, run wild and free.

What concerns me at times is when a person says that he/she is making every living minute of his/her life count, but then when you see them later on whether it be a few minutes, hours, months, or years, that person still has not DONE anything of substance.  I have, oddly enough, found some of these people sitting on the couch drinking a beer while laughing at some odd thing on TV.  I agree on the concept of wanting to make every minute count, but that includes those moments where I STILL need to learn to relax, to not think and just...be.  I may not know the 'true meaning of [my] existence' although I would like to explore something more that I have to offer.  I want to present something creatively, but while doing my own thing, I also want to explore the ideas and concepts of others.  I want to see the world through someone else's eyes and not as a negative form, but with the idea that there are POSSIBILITIES.  With this in mind, I want to spend more time helping others.  I have, in the past, been a person who seems to be a stepping stone for others to achieve greatness and now I want to be...a bigger stone?  I know it sounds a bit silly, although the more I help the stronger I can make the world around me.

Hmm....I seem to have stumbled across something, how strength is a bigger part of me as a person.  I do not know how many of you have read past posts, which reflect many different trials and tribulations, which offer much to be viewed on what can define strength.

So what does this year hold for me personally?
-Strength
-Facing of fears
-A bit of carelessness (within reason I suppose since I am 'a responsible adult')
-Experience
-To embrace that idea that I did something with my life instead of waste it

With that all said and done, I offer to any of you reading this to join me, even if you are just watching me from the sidelines as I smash into a tree on my sky-diving landing (this would be just my luck).  I welcome anyone who, like me, is passionate about wanting the most from live.....and then some. :-D